irony

It is not unusual for my daughter to tell me, in great detail, how she will do things differently when she is the Mama. She will let her children watch ANYTHING on television especially any cartoons and anything that comes on the Disney channel. She will allow her children to participate in Halloween activities. She probably won't homeschool, though she does waver on this one. The list goes on and varies depending on what I am NOT allowing her to do at any given moment.

I suppose I could be offended by these statements, but instead I find them amusing, mostly because I remember having those same kinds of thoughts when I was a kid. I do think that I was older and my plans mostly included NOT treating my daughter any different than my sons when it came to dating and such. Ha! Now, I think arranged marriages and/or courting are looking better and better!

But, that isn't really the irony that this post is about.

Honestly, the big thing about what I would do differently has more to do with making my own decisions rather than just accepting what my parents decided for me. Now, in my mid 30's, having been married for 12 years and having 3 kids, you would think that I would be thrilled to be able to make ALL of the decisions (together with my husband, of course).

So, why is that now I wish that someone would tell me what to do? No questions, just straight answers. Lay the plan out in front of me and I'll follow!

Somehow, it just isn't that easy. As grown-ups, when faced with a big decision, (like we are right now!) we know that nothing is done in a vacuum. Any decision we make will most definitely affect our kids and could affect other people we care about.

I am thankful for life lessons though. When faced with similar decisions early in our marriage, Ronnie and I only gave lip service to "seeking God's will." Not that we didn't have a desire to follow God then, we just had a much higher view of our own ability to make decisions back then.

We've learned a little bit since then. A song that our pastor loves to quote comes to mind ... I can't even walk without You holding my hand. That may not be an exact quote, but you get the picture. At this point in our lives, we are much more aware of just how needy we are.

And that is what makes LB's attitude about doing things her way so amusing. Because I know that one of these days she'll be sitting where I am. And my prayer is that we will have taught her where to find the help she needs.

A Song of degrees.

I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help.
My help cometh from the LORD, which made heaven and earth.
He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber.
Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep.
The LORD is thy keeper: the LORD is thy shade upon thy right hand.
The sun shall not smite thee by day, nor the moon by night.
The LORD shall preserve thee from all evil: he shall preserve thy soul.
The LORD shall preserve thy going out
and thy coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore.

Psalm 121